5 tips on how to give negative feedback

I used to shy away from giving negative feedback to colleagues, but I found it always caused me more problems in the long run.

Over time I’ve learned that the more honest and open I am with feedback, the faster my team grows.

But the real challenge lies in how to deliver negative feedback effectively, without crushing motivation. Here are the techniques I’ve developed over time to give feedback in a way that’s constructive, encouraging, and productive.

1. Start with Positivity and Give a Heads-Up

Rather than diving straight into the negative, I always give a little context first. Setting the stage by acknowledging the good work helps the person receiving the feedback feel valued and seen before addressing areas of improvement. It also softens the impact of what’s coming next.

Tip: Start by saying something like, “You’ve done great work so far, and I’d like to discuss a couple of things we can improve moving forward.” This sets a balanced tone for the conversation.

2. Use the Passive Voice to Depersonalise the Issue

Directly blaming someone can make them feel defensive, which isn’t productive. That’s why I use the passive voice when possible – it takes the focus off the individual and puts it on the action. It also helps to keep the conversation about the issue, not about their personal failings.

Tip: For example, instead of saying “You missed the deadline,” try “The deadline was missed.” This keeps the discussion about the outcome, rather than putting the person on the spot.

3. Use the Magic Word ‘Yet’ to Encourage Hope

When you’re pointing out areas of improvement, it’s important to maintain a sense of possibility and hope. Using the word ‘yet’ can turn a statement of failure into one of progress and potential. It shows that the issue is not permanent and that there’s still an opportunity to make things right.

Tip: For example, instead of saying, “The target hasn’t been met,” say “The target hasn’t been met… yet.” This brings a sense of hope, which is crucial for motivation.

4. Be Direct, But Supportive

While it’s important to be clear and direct in your feedback, it’s equally important to show your support. Asking how you can help make improvements gives the person a chance to take ownership and feel empowered, rather than feeling overwhelmed or helpless.

Tip: Ask questions like, “Can you make this a priority?” or “Is there anything you need from me to help make this happen?” This shows you’re on their side and willing to support them in achieving the necessary changes.

5. Schedule Follow-Up to Keep Accountability

Feedback shouldn’t be a one-time conversation. To ensure that the feedback sticks and that progress is made, I always schedule a follow-up to check in on how things are going. This shows that you’re invested in their success and provides a concrete way to track improvement.

Tip: Try something like, “Let’s schedule a meeting for two weeks' time to check in on how it’s going.” This sets a clear expectation for accountability and provides an opportunity for further support.

Giving constructive feedback doesn’t have to be uncomfortable. By approaching it with a positive, supportive attitude and following these tips, you can make feedback a tool for growth, not just for your team but for yourself as a leader. Start practicing these strategies, and watch your team thrive.

Got a conversation coming up where you need to share some difficult feedback? Check out our courses Mastering Difficult Conversations and Delivering Impactful Appraisals.